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Not looking for followers, couldn't care less if ppl do or not. Just awareness for how things are ACTUALLY done. Change is inevitable, quicker it's done, less risk to the emotional and physical well-being of our kids. @ChildYouthandFamilyEnhancement
#EveryChildMatters?
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I Havnt seen my four children For a years now and it doesnt get any easier in fact it gets hatcer. The mum to my children Doesnt even allow the children who have phones have my or allow them to have me on any social platforms. She has even now stopped them seeIng all of my sIde of the family its heartbreaking. She doesnt realise the damage It is having on the children. Personally i class this as abuse due to the fact my oldest is 13 now and has asked his mum on numerous occasions now to see his dad but She refuses and tells him he can see me when he turns 16. The last time my oldest spoke to my sister he told her he wishes he could live with me. He has told my sister he feels abused by his mum as he is forced to…
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When my twin sons where first born I done everything for them from changing nappies to late night feeds, I put them to bed every night and got up with them every morning, unfortunately my relationship with their mum was a toxic one and due to not wanting my children seeing constant fights I ended the relationship. For 2 years their mum let me see them and even stay over night on the sofa on weekends so I could spend more time with them, as soon as I announced that I was seeing someone (whom is now my wife) she started making false accusations against me and stopped me seeing my boys, she even moved home without telling me know. I found her new address and starting sending birthday and Christmas gifts to my children but with no reply or correspondence from her or them. I saw them last when…
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I Didn't know I was suffering from CPTSD, one mistake and my children ended up being handed to their father despite me explaining their father had a history of alcoholism, links to IRA (evidence of parents and grandparents glorifying it) and I have video evidence of him admitting to DV and child abuse.
He got awarded full contact of the children and it was agreed I would see them "on a basis consistent with their development". A 7 and a 5 year old when all this happened. Both boys and they literally were my world despite everything.
I would have patchy contact, never allowed phone calls or video calls and all contact had to go through his mother as he was "autistic".
Then the messages from her would come through saying I was texting to frequently (once a week when I wouldnt see them to see how their school week…
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Hello I am a mother of 2 children, but I am only able to see one. The one I do see I only see him every week for 2 1/2 hours. I have tried to talk to his father about getting more time but that has not been the case. I love my son so much. We have shared custody, but the father has the last say on everything about our son. So, I just have been going with the flow but recently our son and his father had to move out of a woman's home that his father had another kid with. Our son has not been taking that well and seems to be getting worse. I want to help him as much as I can but it's not easy when I don't get to see nor talk to him over the phone at all. I want to b…
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Hi everyone, I’m new here and wanted to share what I’m currently going through.
I have two daughters, aged 4 and 1. I’ve always been heavily involved in their care, including being a stay-at-home dad for a period. After separation I moved into my own place in January and, for around 8 months, we had an established arrangement where the girls spent 4 nights a week with me and 3 with their mum.
On 1 August I asked their mum for £350 a month child maintenance. The CMS calculator suggested considerably more, but I thought £350 was fair. When we couldn’t agree, I eventually went through CMS.
Since around that period, things have deteriorated badly. I can’t prove the maintenance issue caused what followed, but the timing worries me.
Their mum has now stopped all normal unsupervised contact, saying she has concerns about the girls’ emotional wellbeing and safety. I…
@Ashley Stephens Hi mate, so much of what you’ve written feels painfully familiar, particularly your concern about money being the trigger.
I’m a dad to three boys. My eldest has lived with me for around six years, and until March I had an established shared care arrangement for my younger two. There was a dispute over their mum continuing to claim Child Benefit and Universal Credit for my eldest while he was living with me. A Child Benefit decision came shortly before everything changed. Like you, I can’t prove that money caused what followed, but the timing concerns me.
On 8 March I went to their mum’s home to collect my 2 younger boys when I was informed that my middle son Charlie was not being returned. I was then assaulted by her partner and her father. I involved the police who later attended, and I subsequently obtained non molestation orders against both men.
Following the assault, the police and the schools were given an account which, from my own experience of what happened, was a complete reversal of the truth. Charlie witnessed the assault himself. He saw what actually happened to me, yet I have not seen him since that evening. he has effectively been withheld, alienated and silenced.
That is one of the hardest parts to live with. My son was there and witnessed the truth, but since then we have been separated, while an entirely different version of events has been presented to others.
I still have contact with my youngest, Ellis, who still lives with me 50% but my relationship with Charlie has been reduced to nothing. Going from being an involved, loving dad to suddenly being excluded from your child’s everyday life is incredibly painful.
I’ve been through the family court process, including Cafcass and a Section 7 report. The recommendation was wholly child led contact with Charlie. My concern is that this places the responsibility for rebuilding our relationship on him, when I believe the adults around him have influenced the situation. I don’t want him forced to see me or caught in the middle. I want him supported to have a relationship with both parents without pressure or guilt. The court system DOES NOT WORK and lets child down repeatedly. Such a shame.
What you said about holding yourself together during the video call and breaking down afterwards really hit home. People don’t always understand the grief of having a child who is still here, who you love desperately, but whose life you’re suddenly kept outside.
I wish I could tell you I’ve found the answer. I haven’t, and I’m still working through it. But I wanted you to know you’re not alone. Wanting to continue being the dad you’ve always been is something I understand completely.
Take care of yourself, mate. I really hope you get to hold your girls again soon.
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I’m a custodial mother. The state nor cps took my kids … I sent my kids to my mom and stepdad for summer. Only 30 days. My kids said my stepdad sexually assaulted them so I tried to get them back… and my stepdad put a protective order on me! He lied on the protective order stating cps told them to take custody cause I’m on drugs. Well I’m not. It’s a cover up for his bs. But since protective orders have to be abided by I haven’t seen or heard from my kids nor gotten to know anything about them. My parents scream bloody murder at me if I ask about my kids.
How is it even possible to kidnap my kids through a protective order that’s hearsay?? There’s no proof. My cps office said it’s a false claim. But now I’ve had family members reach out to me…
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Hello, my name is Tory and I live in California. My ex was slowly manipulating my children (7 & 5) at first, now she filed abuse allegations through their doctor's office. The kids have been taken from me, I have years of documentation that shows her actions, court doesn't care at all. They all think I am a monster. Yet, my fiancé's son, who lives with us 60% of the time, has never said a thing. In fact his dad wrote me a character reference and called me his friend. They won't talk to my bonus son, they won't talk to my fiancé. My children have said their mother will be angry with them for seeing me and the judge has looked at me saying this is all my fault.
I have genuinely questioned my sanity, but I know it isn't me. I just don't know what to do anymore.…
No words can help that feeling of sadness. Not being able to communicate with your children is torture. Thinking good thoughts for you brother. Don’t stop trying!!! Even when it’s paralyzing. You got this!!